The Fool's Corner

A king was preparing to ride off on a quest. Before he leaves, he locks up the queen with a chastity belt and calls in his most trusted knight and hands him the key. "Sir Percival, here is the key to my queen's honor. Should I fall in battle, it is to you to release her from her belt so she might marry again." He then leaves on his journey. At the top of a hill, he turns back for one last look at his castle and is surprised to see Sir Percival riding breakneck in pursuit. "My lord, my lord....wait! You have given me the wrong key!"

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A medieval astrologer prophesied to a king that his favorite mistress would soon die.
Sure enough, the woman died a short time later. The king was outraged at the astrologer, certain that his prophecy had brought about the woman's death. He summoned the astrologer and commanded him: "Prophecy, tell me when you will die!" The astrologer realized that the king was planning to kill him immediately, no matter what answer he gave. "I do not know when I will die," he answered finally. "I only know that whenever I die, the king will die three days later."

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Question: Why were the early days of history called the dark ages ?
Answer: Because there were so many knights !

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The knight returned to the king’s castle with prisoners, bags of gold and other riches from his victories. “Tell me of your battles,” said the king. “Well, Sire, I have been robbing and stealing on your behalf for weeks, burning all of the villages of your enemies in the north.” The king was horrified. “But I have no enemies in the north,” he said. “Well,” said the knight, “you do now.”